Miss v. Ma'am

So, I am confused. Friday night, Melissa and I were at Applebees and I order a drink...."Can I see your ID?"....."What, I don't look 21?".....Awkward smile (oh and her name was Tima by the way....??)....today at Schlotzsky's...."What can I get for you, Miss?"......later on today at grocery store....."How are you today, Ma'am?"......"Thank you, Ma'am, you have a nice day"....so, what am I? The ruling of the court is most definitely Miss!!!! What are you crazies doing calling me Ma'am???? Most people tell me I look 19, personally I think it's because I am vertically challenged and not because I really do look 19, but I will say I am NOT ready to be called Ma'am....MADAME, maybe....(wink)....but I digress. MA'AM is what people call our mothers, grandmothers, aunts.....that is what WE are supposed to call people, not be called by people. I like the French standard, Madamoiselle until you marry. Then you can be a Madame. So, right here and now I would just like to declare that if I don't marry and you see me when I am 94 years old, do NOT address me as Ma'am. If you please....it will be Madamoiselle for me....I wonder if they would charge extra for my gravestone....